Come and see American wonder, come and see American wonder! ~ Anon
This post was delayed by a combination of jet lag, COVID and lousiness but finally, here we are. I could have captioned it “How To Migrate To America” or one of the numerous Hows to get hits but naaah, that has never been my style because I write for a special audience. Yes, a growing community of friends, writers and other creatives who appreciate my versatility and not-too-recent transition from political opinions to texts that add real value. So American Wonder will be a multi-part treatise that offers information, tips and resources on migrating to God’s own country.
If you grew up in the nostalgic 80s Nigeria like I did you will be familiar with my opening verse which is a song commonly recited by journeymen while performing tricks. It was so popular that the audience would often sing along as they watched and those who witnessed American wonder often turned out to be streetwise.
I think we should seek out the originator of this song and give the person a befitting chieftaincy title because America is indeed the land of plenty. Oh yes, it is so vast and rich that a single state can match countless nations in size and GDP. Little wonder the average American is usually confident and willing to tread where eagles dare without trepidation. In global competitions, their athletes howl and bark with authority as if the trophy is already in the kitty. A friend joked that it is so because they already feel like winners since national tournaments like the baseball championship are referred to as the World Series.
You can’t possibly enumerate the things that are different and unique to Americans. From the light switch to the confusing date order and non-metric measurements. There are drive-thru restaurants everywhere, and then you have huge coffee/soda cups and endless refills. The iconic yellow school buses are kings of the road, don’t mess with them. And then you have the annoying but cheaper price tags that are exclusive of taxes. Why not just include the damn taxes?!
From the expansive George Bush Intercontinental Airport to Dallas and Las Vegas, 9 out of 10 vehicles are trucks. With a population of about 332 million, America has almost 300 million registered vehicles as of 2021. These people…